To Do The Best We Can

God Doesn't Write With a Pen

God Doesn't Write With a Pen by Christi Lynn Pauline

With his country on the brink of civil war, Blema Fangamou fears for the lives of his family. God Doesn't Write with a Pen recounts the many miracles the Fangamou family from West Africa despite war and separation from each other. The Fangamous help readers lift their faith and recognize miracles in their own lives.

This incredible true story recounts the Fangamous' amazing journey of hardships, miracles, reunions, and life-altering experiences to help us recognize the tender mercies in our own lives.

John H. Groberg, emeritus General Authority and author says, "The story of the Fangamou family is both compelling and inspiring. Christi Pauline has done a great job of capturing the turbulent emotions of this family as they pass through trial after trial with continued trust in the Lord. It is a fascinating and rewarding read."

I recommend this book as a must read for all those who have a tender spot for the suffering in Africa. This family has, by the miracles of God, come to the United States, found faith in Heavenly Father, and been reunited after war ripped their family apart.

It is well written and an easy, faith promoting read. Enjoy, Christy Monson

Strength Your Sense of Self

Our back yard is full of scrub oak trees where a little squirrel loves to run and play. A yappy little Yorkie--cuter than anything--lives at our house. Squirrel and Yorkie love to argue with each other. Squirrel is smart and loves to tease. He can have Yorkie running in circles as he chases through the trees.

I brought Yorkie in the house the other day because their argument was going on so long I was afraid neighbor relations would become strained. But Yorkie didn’t quit barking at Squirrel. He headed for the door to the upper deck and continued yapping. Squirrel hopped onto the branch nearest the door and danced back and forth, chattering all the time.

Squirrel was in complete control of Yorkie’s feelings. Yorkie couldn’t think of anything but barking at Squirrel. Now, granted, Yorkshire Terriers were bred to catch small rodents—including squirrels, so it’s not really fair to ask him to control his feelings. But we, as intelligent human beings can be very like Yorkie at times.

How often do we allow others to choose our feelings? How many times have you said something like, ‘You make me so mad.’? Or we become angry when a loved one is critical of us. Maybe we’ve been anxious because a spouse didn’t get home on time. 

The process of strengthening our sense of self comes slowly as we grow from child to adult. Maturity brings some control. But there are several things we can do to keep ourselves from being overtaken emotionally by those around us.

1.      Stop when you find yourself losing emotional control. Take a time out. Relax for a few minutes in a quiet place.

2.      Do some deep breathing.

3.      Remember that your thinking determines your feelings. During your quiet time change your thinking.

4.      Remind yourself that no one can decide your feelings but you. Reframe your situation to a positive one. Just because someone else is upset doesn’t mean you need to fill yourself with negative energy.

5.      Cherish yourself and the good about you. Imagine yourself being filled with sunlight.

When you are calm, go back and face your situation with positive energy, letting those around you know you love them but are unwilling to engage in their negativity. Infuse yourself with light so that others may see your strength and goodness.

Even yappy little Yorkie is the most loving, gentle bundle of fur around (when no rodents are present).

Christy Monson is the author of Love, Hugs, and Hope When Scary Things Happen and Becoming Free, A Woman’s Guide to Internal Strength. Both will be in book stores September 1, 2013.

Service nurtures both the giver and receiver

No man can help another without helping himself. Ralph Waldo Emerson

One day last spring, I had the privilege of helping my mother, who had cancer, rake her front lawn. Even though the doctor had put her on hospice, she was still very active She loved yard work and wanted her garden pristine. Her messy pine tree thwarted that wish at times, so we constantly picked up pine cones and raked pine needles.

She was exhausted after half an hour's work, but determined to finish--raking errant needles and cones, then resting a minute, only to begin again. Over and over until the task was complete. What a privilege it was to work with her. What a sense of industry and follow through she had. Her gift to me that day--the inspiration to stick to a task and complete it no matter what--was greater than any small about of help I gave her in the yard.

I have a neighbor that just turned 100. She’s in a rest home now, and I visit her every week for just a few minutes. Her face brightens when I enter the room. She’s so happy to see me. I catch her up on neighborhood news, and she asks how her yard looks. Has her grandson trimmed her roses? Are her tulips in bloom yet? I do love seeing her and giving her a hug. I feel filled with love every time I leave her side.

What a blessing it is to enjoy the elderly in my life. Their wisdom coupled with their child-like purity filters warmth into every part of my being. I love being part of their goodness.

Ralph Waldo Emerson's words, No man can help another without helping himself, rings true to me, bringing copious bounty into my life.

A Light at the End of the Tunnel

June married a handsome young man who was kind and hard working. She knew she was headed for a “happily ever after” type of life. But as the years went by, June could sense that something was wrong in her relationship. Her husband began to work late many nights. When she asked him about it, he told her he had extra jobs. But the extra jobs were never ending.

June did some investigating and found that he had had a pornography addiction since college. June called her best friend and cried. What had happened to the problem-free life she’d thought she was getting? She and her husband had been together for twenty-five years. There were the children to consider.

Her pastor encouraged both of them to seek therapy. Her husband agreed to counseling. He attended an addiction group and participated in a rehabilitation program as well as separate sessions with his own therapist.

When June came to me for therapy, she was depressed and overwhelmed with her situation. Laundry piled up and the house was a mess. She spent hours journaling her anger and betrayal and then sharing it in therapy. As the months went by, June recovered her ability to participate in daily life. She and her husband learned to communicate on a deeper level than they ever had before.  

As she finished therapy, I asked June if she thought she had made a mistake in marrying her husband. She said when she first found out about the pornography, she would have said yes, but now she had found the light at the end of the tunnel. She could see all the good that had come from their troubles—the strength she had gained from her trial.

Find the light at the end of your tunnel.

1.              Explore all your options.

2.              Be solution focused—find an answer that’s right for you.

3.              Decide what you will do differently next time.

4.              Be kind to yourself—don’t blame yourself.

5.              Write positive affirmations. Say them daily.

6.              Create gratitude statements. Say them daily.

7.              Look to your higher power for blessings.

There is always a light at the end of the tunnel—if you look for it.

Read more about this topic and others in Christy Monson’s new book, Becoming Free, A Woman’s Guide to Internal Strength, available on Kindle, Nook, and iPad September 1^st 2013.

Penumbras

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Conner Dell didn’t mean to blow up

the school bus. Or the bathrooms. In fact, he only wanted to go to sleep and possibly

dream about Melanie Stephens.

But explosions had a funny way of happening when Conner and his friends were around.

The twins, Conner and Lexa find themselves in a battle with the darkness. Conner, surrounded by shadows, thinks he has become a Darkhand, The struggle he faces between the light and the dark may just kill him.

Lexa is jealous that Conner likes her best friend Melanie. Will the three of them work their problems out?

Lexa has her own set of troubles when her teacher and mentor, Dr. Timberi doesn’t choose her for the lead in the school musical. In fact, she thinks it may be her fault that Dr. Timberi dies—or does he?

Bell’s characters come alive in this fast-paced middle grade fantasy. It’s a fun read for kids and grandkids. Begin with the first book, The Kindling, and give your family a fun read to close out the summer.

I highly recommend Bell’s writing and these two books. Enjoy, Enjoy.

http://www.bradenbell.com/penumbras.html

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Overcoming Life's Handicaps

Helen Keller

As I looked for positive self-talk quotes the other day, I came across several by Helen Keller. We all know the story of Helen’s mind opening to the understanding of language through the dedicated efforts of her teacher, Anne Sullivan. How difficult it must have been for Helen to overcome her handicaps. What obstacles she had. 

Helen became the first deaf/blind person to earn a college degree, graduating from Radcliff in 1904. Helen went on to become a writer, public speaker, and an advocate for the disabled.

She is an inspiration in positive thinking and actions. Here are a few of her quotes. Enjoy.

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched—they must be felt with the heart.

What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.

Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.

I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still l can do something.