Don't Get Run Over

 
A young man about twenty came into my office for some counseling. He felt depressed. He worked a delivery job for a shipping company and hated it. It was boring. He wanted more meaningful work, but didn't know if he was even capable of doing something else.
He had come from an alcoholic family and didn't want to turn out like his parents. But he couldn't figure out how to change his life. As he talked, he told me that right out of high school he drank himself into oblivion at parties. He ran his credit cards up without any thought of how to pay them back.
One by one his friends began to get on with their lives. One went off to college. Another joined the Air Force. Someone else joined an international development group.
He sat alone one night and decided to change his life. He quit drinking (except for an occasional social drink), cut up his credit cards, and found the delivery job he now held.
He still felt his life was going nowhere. What could he do to change that?
I was excited to point out the significant changes he'd made already. Could he see that he had walked beyond the addictions of drinking and spending that many people struggle a life time to overcome? He had internal strength that he hadn't looked at before. He had never noticed these successes before, and he began to feel better about himself.

As he started to set goals, he decided he wanted to get a college degree. With my encouragement, he talked with a counselor at the local university and got himself enrolled in school. He came back to see me for a final session, saying he was 'scared to death.' How could he compete with smart kids just out of high school when he'd been away from school for so long?

I gave him this Will Rogers quote and told him he hadn't sat still long enough to get run over yet, and he probably wouldn't now.   

                                                                                                                 

Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there. 

He laughed and said he was still scared. Could we outline a program to help him keep going along the right track. Here is what he came up with:

1.         Set a long term goal. (Go to college)

2.         Make sure my short term goals matched my long term plans. (Register for classes)

3.         Prioritize my day so I accomplish my short term goals. (Study first thing each day.)

4.         Evaluate my short term goals every month to make sure I'm on task, and readjust my

short term goals if necessary. (Stay on task. If I get side-tracked, get myself refocused.)

5.         Look for daily successes and pat myself on the back for my accomplishments. (Compliment myself for my small successes each day.)

This young man was successful because he set long term and short term goals and evaluated his progress monthly. I wish you happy goal-setting, and best wishes for your success.

Find Happiness All Year Long

Discover joy in service not only during this holiday season, but all year long.

 

 

 

True happiness comes from the joy of deeds well done.
Antoine de Saint-Exupery

The Divinity of this Season

This is the holiday season of the year. Amidst the hustle and bustle, let's take time to remember the beauty in God's creations: your family, your surroundings, and your blessings. I love this Michael Angelo quote. No work of art can compare with divine perfection. Let's give thanks for the divinity in our lives.

True work of art is but a shadow of divine perfection. Michael Angelo

Blog Hop Winner

Congratulations to Linda Kish, winner of Becoming Free.

Thanks to all who participated in the blog hop. I love and appreciate you viewers.

Best Ever Toffee Recipe

English Toffee

Ingredients

1 cup butter
1 cup sugar
5 Tablespoons water
Vanilla
Chopped nuts (if desired)
Chocolate Chips

Melt butter with sugar and water

Melt butter with sugar and water. Turn the heat on high and don't turn it down. Stir constantly.

Cook for 10 - 15 minutes

Cook 10 - 15 minutes until the candy is caramelized.

Caramelized Candy

The candy will be caramelized when it turns a light brown and you see little puffs of smoke coming from the bubbles. Add add the vanilla before you pour the candy out to cool.

Pour Candy onto nuts

Pour candy out to cool. Use a marble slab if you have one. Otherwise set a cookie sheet onto a bread board to protect your counter from the heat and pour toffee onto the cookie sheet.

Sprinkle with chocolate

Sprinkle on the chocolate chips and let them melt.

Spread the melted chocolate

Spread the chocolate out and let the candy cool until the chocolate is set.

Break the toffee into pieces

Break the cooled toffee into pieces and enjoy!

Gratitude

Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others. Cicero

I am grateful for those of you who read my posts and follow this blog. I'm giving away my Becoming Free, A Woman's Guide to Inner Strength as a thank you. Leave a comment to enter the drawing. I'm grateful you dropped by.

Some thoughts on gratitude

Enjoy the beauty of your surroundings. I love the fall colors

Spend a day giving thanks for the beauties around you.

1.                  Sit on the patio and enjoy the last of the warm sunshine.

2.                  Notice the birds in your area and appreciate their beauty.

Be grateful for your friends.

1.                  I don't know about you, but my friends keep me going.

2.                  Send emails to your friends, thanking them for their love.

3.                  Compliment each of your friends during the day.  
    

Thank family members for all they do for you.

1.                  Have a Secret Pal week in your family.

2.                  Make 'I love you' cards.

3.                  Hug everyone at least twice a day.

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. John F. Kennedy

Have a great day! Christy

Failure, The Key to Success

I love to write, but marketing my books after they are published is not my favorite past time. The other day I sent out a press release. I expected some response from it, but got nothing. I felt a little depressed and then more depressed. What else could I do?
I have a wonderful, plucky author friend, Drienie Hattingh, originally from South Africa, who has had good success  marketing books. I was complaining to her that I was a failure, and she told me I had to be more proactive--do more than just send out an electronic press release. "Go to the newspaper or the radio station in person and take them a book."
I did it, and found success.
What did my sweet friend teach me?
1.         I needed to be more proactive. I could do more than just sit and wait. In short, I needed a giant dose of persistence.
2.         If things didn't go just like I wanted them to, I had to find another way. People that are successful are resilient enough to try something else.
3.         If one thing doesn't work, try something else. I went to a workshop where I heard the phrase, 'No only means next.'

Here are a few famous people who failed before they found success.

Walt Disney by Nasa

Walt Disney was fired from a newspaper job because the editor told him he didn't have an imagination or good ideas. Disney went on to start several more businesses that failed and ended in bankruptcy.

Abraham Lincoln by Edward Mendel

Abraham Lincoln lost his job, failed in business, was defeated for Congress and the Senate among other trials. He was finally elected President in 1860. What would our country have been without his persistence and resilience?

J.K. Rowling by Daniel Ogren

J.K. Rowling, author of Harry Potter, began the first book as a poor divorcee with a child to raise. She only had an old manual typewriter to write the first book on. After she finished the book, twelve publishers refused the manuscript. The editor at Bloomsbury who finally accepted the novel told her to get a day job because there was no money in books for kids.

 “You might never fail on the scale I did,” Rowling said. “But it is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all—in which case, you fail by default."

So now I feel embarrassed and somewhat ashamed of my complaints because of my own lack of effort. My success will be measured by how many times I can keep going despite hearing 'no.'

Use your failures as stepping stones to success.

Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success. Dale Carnegie

The Emerald Ring Book Review and Giveaway

Sara Bogus's life turns upside down when she discovers an emerald ring that once belonged to Cleopatra. With the help of her BFF, Heidi,  she discovers an unsettling connection between the recent burglaries in her neighborhood and her new piece of jewelry.

The fun of discovering the ring's unique abilities turns to fear when Sara finds out a dangerous cult bent on restoring Rome to power is after the ring. Forced to choose between keeping the ring and saving her friends, Sara learns the price of bravery in this electrifying read!

A great action-packed read the will thrill children everywhere, this book has an intriguing twist that all readers will enjoy.

Purchase this book as a great Christmas gift for children in your life.

Follow this blog and leave a comment for a chance to win a signed copy of the book.

About the author

Dorine White is a children's author and a book reviewer. I grew up back East in Maryland and attended BYU in Utah. I have a BA in Humanities with an interest in Art History and French. Currently I live in the beautiful, yet rainy Northwest with my husband and 6 children.

My first book in The Cleopatra's Legacy series, The Emerald Ring, was published by Cedar Fort Books on May 14, 2013. It is a middle grade fantasy novel that involves Ancient Egypt, Cleopatra, and a magic emerald ring.

You can find me online at www.dorinewhite.com or check out my book blog at www.dorinewhite.blogspot.com.

Sacred Space

I love walking in the woods near our cabin in Idaho. There's a fairly steep hill to climb to reach the forest, so I'm breathing heavily when I get there.

 The tall lodge pole pines wave their spindly heads in the breeze far above me. I know they are whispering blessings from heaven.

 I walk through the soft mountain grass and enjoy the profusion of yellow daisies and mountain violets growing amidst the green.

An errant Jay flits from tree to tree, chased by a chattering squirrel. The fresh pine scent fills the air. Silence sifts among the forest sounds. I look for huckle berries on the north slope as I walk. I pluck the savory fruit here and there, and enjoy the sweetness in my mouth. Small white butterflies flit from bush to bush. I am at peace.
I have been there so often, I can go there in my mind any time I want. During busy days I take a break to spend a few minutes there. I love the forest. It's a place for me to center myself and let go of the hurry of life.

Escape from the tensions of the day.

Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again. Joseph Campbell

Create your own sacred space.
1.         Choose some place you love to be.
2.         Picture your surroundings in your mind.
3.         Feel the breeze. Is it sunny or cloudy?
4.         Listen for the sounds.
5.         Smell the air around you. Are there other smells?
6.         Touch the earth beneath your feet. Feel your environment.
7.         Experience the tastes around you.

The more you place yourself in your location, the greater the relaxation you'll experience.

Do you have a sacred space? Let it fill you with light. Let it center you.

What's Coming Up Next

This post is part of a blog tour, and I've been asked to share what I'm working on.

My goal in writing is to make a difference in the world. I love the concept of adding light and goodness to life. That is my driving force--long term and short term.

I'm just beginning to edit a book I've written on Family Councils. I'm excited about this work because there is really nothing out there to help parents and family work together to communicate in a more timely manner. Many factors make parenting harder now than ever before. Single moms and dads have a difficult task ahead of them, rearing children alone. Communication is vital if things are to run smoothly. In many two-parent families, both mom and dad are working, making it hard to come home to parent after a long day out of the home. Sometimes kids are just baffling. I share secrets of how to see what's going on in their heads.

I address all these issues in my new book to be out in 2014. Here is a possible book cover.

I love writing self help books. It's wonderful to receive notes from readers saying that my books have made a difference in their lives.

I try to write every morning. I'm an early-in-the-day person. By night my brain is fried.

Here are the covers of my two new books just out.

Love, Hugs and Hope is a book to help children and parents through difficult times in a child's life. It is designed to show kids how to release their feelings and reframe problems in a positive way in their lives.

Becoming Free is a guide to help all of us become the best we can be. It begins with goal setting chapters--both long and short term goals. The next section looks at mistaken childhood beliefs that plague us all at times. Then comes communication skills, and finally I discuss all the theraputic techniques I used my my counseling practice to aid us in positive thinking and peaceful living.

Next Monday look for a peek into Margot Hovley's new novel to be published by Covenant, and Chris Miller's latest work. I love their writing and highly recommend their books.

http://www.margothovley.com/

http://www.millerchris.com/