Saturday, April 25, 2020

How Can I Comfort Those Who Have Lost Loved Ones to Covid 19?

Nothing could be worse than to know you are dying and not be able to have your loved ones around you!

What a lonely feeling for those near death!

What a helpless feeling for loved ones!

What can we do to comfort those grieving?

Stop and think before you talk!
You can’t fix the situation with placating thoughts or ‘griefisms’ like: “You’ll get through this.” “Give yourself time.” “Find the blessings in this.” These statements, though meant kindly, shut down communication and drive the grieving person away.

It’s comforting to be able to share feelings and know someone hears our sorrow. Don’t offer suggestions. Each person grieves in their own way. Trust enough to know they will find their path through their burden.

Understanding bonds us to each other. Being left alone with no one who will ‘hear’ the depth of our grief gives us the feeling of isolation—of being imprisoned with our own feelings.

Touch in times of sorrow can be healing. Right after my husband died, a neighbor stood on the doorstep and gave me a hug. Oh, how I needed that hug. I will never forget it. Touch rejuvenates and connects us in our loneliness.